ഇനി എത്ര ദൂരം

 

Being a Woman in Mathematics: My Journey So Far

My journey with mathematics did not begin with confidence. In fact, until the 10th standard, mathematics was the subject I feared the most. I still remember scoring a B grade in the SSLC examination. For many, that might seem acceptable, but for me it reflected my struggle and lack of interest at the time. Ironically, my father loved mathematics deeply. He would often say, “Even if you fail in all other subjects, you must achieve full marks in mathematics.” My first teachers were my parents, especially in mathematics, and yet I could not develop an interest in it during those early years.

The main reason was not the subject itself but how it was taught to me in high school. I found the classes uninspiring and difficult to connect with. Mathematics appeared as a collection of formulas and procedures rather than a meaningful, logical language. As a result, I grew distant from it and never imagined it would one day become my life’s passion.

After SSLC, I chose the science group in higher secondary because I loved physics, chemistry, and biology. I had no idea that mathematics would be a major component of this stream. I did not choose it out of love for mathematics; I chose it for the other sciences. But life often surprises us in beautiful ways.

From the very first days of Plus One, my perception of mathematics began to change completely. The teachers who handled mathematics at that stage were extraordinary. Their way of teaching opened a new world for me. They did not merely solve problems; they explained the logic behind each step. They made the subject come alive. For the first time, I started seeing mathematics as something interesting, meaningful, and even enjoyable.

I began spending more time with my mathematics textbook than with any other subject. I worked through every exercise problem in the NCERT textbook with genuine curiosity. Solving problems no longer felt like a burden; it became a source of satisfaction. Each correct answer gave me a sense of achievement I had never felt before. Slowly, fear was replaced with fascination.

Then came a moment that changed everything. In the Plus One annual examination, I scored 100 out of 100 in mathematics. I was shocked. For others, it might have been just another good score, but for me and my parents, it was a moment of immense joy and disbelief. A student who once struggled to pass mathematics had achieved full marks. That result was not just a score; it was a turning point in my life. From that day onward, I decided that mathematics would be my path.

I pursued BSc, MSc, and later B.Ed in Mathematics with growing love and commitment to the subject. What once felt impossible had now become my strength. Mathematics was no longer a subject I studied; it became a subject I lived with. The journey from fear to passion taught me an important lesson: sometimes, the problem is not the subject, but the way we experience it.

Today, as a mathematics teacher, I carry this experience into my classroom. I understand what it feels like to be a student who is afraid of mathematics. I recognize the silent anxiety in some students because I have lived through it myself. This helps me teach with empathy and patience. I focus not only on formulas and theorems but on building confidence and interest.

Being a woman in mathematics adds another meaningful layer to this journey. Standing in front of students as a woman mathematics educator sends a powerful message—especially to young girls—that they too can succeed in this field. Representation matters. When students see someone like them confidently handling mathematics, it quietly reshapes their beliefs.

Balancing academics, teaching, and personal responsibilities has not always been easy. There were times of self-doubt, tiredness, and challenges. But every difficulty reminded me of the girl who once feared mathematics and later scored full marks through determination and inspiration. That memory continues to motivate me.

My journey so far is a story of transformation—guided by supportive parents, inspiring teachers, and persistent effort. Mathematics taught me more than numbers and equations; it taught me resilience, confidence, and the joy of discovery.

Looking back, I feel grateful that I did not give up on mathematics during my school days. If I had, I would have missed the most beautiful part of my life. Today, I am proud to say that the subject I once feared has become my identity, my profession, and my passion.

Ramsheen T. K.

Assistant Professor of Mathematics

Al Shifa College of Arts and Science, Keezhattur, Perinthalmanna.