Beyond the Screen: Applying Couple Therapy Concepts in ‘Irugapatru’ to Real-life Relationships

         “Irugapatru" (Holding Tight) is a 2023 Tamil movie that revolves around a realistic portrayal of married life, showcasing the complexities and challenges that couples face. The characters feel relatable, and their struggles resonate deeply with the audience. It's a refreshing take on relationships that will leave you reflecting on your own journey.The film is directed by Yuvaraj Dhayalan and stars Shraddha Srinath, Vikram Prabhu, Vidharth, Abarnathi, Sri, and Saniya Iyappan in pivotal roles.

‘Irugapatru’ shows three couples from different economic strata and holds a mirror of society. Mithra holds an ‘honesty hour’ session every week with her husband so they can be honest with each other. But, it’s more about Mithra teaching him psychology and to expressing his feelings. The perfect life of a marriage counsellor (Mithra)  gets complicated because of her own methods and techniques. How the issues are solved and back to their happy married life is the crux of this film. In Rangesh and Pavithra’s household, we see the disinterested couple holding on to each other because of a baby. Divya, on the other hand, says she’s grown out of love with Arjun. These are common relationships we hear in our everyday lives. The representation of these three couples is spot on. It portrays the rosy phases of relationships and how couples slowly begin to fall out of love, mostly due to miscommunication.

 The movie aims to increase awareness in couples therapy, but it feels more like a collection of instructional examples, rather than three cohesive vignettes.Human relationships, a fundamental aspect of our existence, are intricate and multifaceted. Psychology provides valuable insights into the complexity of these connections, unveiling the layers of emotions, behaviors, and cognitive processes that shape our interactions.

Effective communication is the cornerstone of a healthy marriage. Psychologically, the way partners express themselves, listen, and resolve conflicts reflects deeper aspects of their relationship. Miscommunication can stem from differing communication styles, emotional barriers, or unmet needs. In the realm of couple therapy, honing communication skills becomes paramount. Therapists work with couples to unravel patterns of interaction, fostering an environment where each partner feels heard and validated. Through open dialogue, couples can navigate challenges, express needs, and cultivate empathy. Couple therapy provides a structured space for couples to learn and practice effective communication strategies, ultimately fortifying their connection and equipping them with the tools needed to navigate the complexities of married life.

Attachment styles and relationship patterns play a pivotal role in shaping the dynamics of marriage, influencing how individuals connect and respond to their partners. In couple therapy, understanding and addressing these patterns become integral. Therapists delve into the attachment styles of each partner, be it anxious, avoidant, or secure, to uncover the root of relational behaviors. By exploring how early experiences may have shaped these attachment styles, couples gain insight into their emotional responses and communication patterns. Through this awareness, couple therapy facilitates the reshaping of negative cycles and the development of more secure and fulfilling connections. Recognizing and adapting to each other’s attachment needs can significantly contribute to the resilience and longevity of a marriage, fostering a deeper understanding and emotional bond between partners.

Emotional dynamics and conflict resolution are integral elements in the intricate tapestry of marriage, and they often take center stage in couple therapy. By unraveling emotional dynamics, couples can identify triggers and patterns that contribute to conflicts. Couple therapy equips partners with effective conflict resolution strategies, emphasizing active listening, empathy, and compromise. Through this process, couples learn to navigate disagreements constructively, transforming conflicts into opportunities for growth and understanding. The ability to manage emotional dynamics and resolve conflicts becomes a cornerstone for building resilience within the marriage, fostering a healthier, more communicative, and enduring partnership.

In the realm of couple therapy, the dynamics of intimacy and connection take center stage, serving as pivotal elements in the success and longevity of a marriage. Through open dialogue and guided exploration, couples can unravel barriers that hinder intimacy, fostering a deeper understanding of each other's needs and vulnerabilities. The therapeutic process aims to cultivate a sense of connection by nurturing effective communication, empathy, and shared goals. Ultimately, as couples navigate the path towards increased intimacy, they fortify the foundation of their marriage, creating a resilient and fulfilling bond that stands the test of time.

Each partner brings their unique psychological makeup into the relationship. Personal histories, traumas, and unresolved issues can significantly impact marital dynamics. Marriage counselors delve into these individual factors to identify how they contribute to the complexities within the relationship, aiming for holistic understanding and healing. Cognitive distortions, such as negative thought patterns or irrational beliefs, can influence how individuals perceive their partners and the relationship. Psychological interventions target these distortions, encouraging couples to reframe their perspectives and develop more constructive of thinking about themselves and each other.

In essence, the application of psychological concepts from 'Irugapatru' to real-life relationships highlights the relevance of fiction in understanding and navigating the complexities of human connections. By delving beyond the screen, we uncover valuable insights that can enhance our interpersonal skills, fostering deeper and more meaningful relationships in the real world.  By acknowledging and addressing the multifaceted layers of human connections, both on and beyond the screen, individuals can embark on a journey towards building healthier, more communicative, and enduring partnerships.

Ms. Shameema Sabini, Assistant Professor of Psychology, Al Shifa College of Arts and Science, Kizhattoor, Perinthalmanna