ഇനി എത്ര ദൂരം

 

AI Can Listen. But Can It Truly Connect?

When was the last time you planned something without asking Google, checking social media, or turning to AI? Think about the little things. What should I wear? What should I eat? How should I reply to this message? What should I say in an argument? Even “Why am I feeling like this?” can now be typed into a chatbot and answered within seconds.

There seems to be an answer for almost everything. And increasingly, that answer is AI.

What began as a tool for finding information has quietly become part of how we live. We use AI to write, plan, organise, create, make decisions and sometimes even think for us. Instead of sitting with a problem or talking it through with someone, we can type it out and receive an answer almost immediately. It is convenient, but it also raises an uncomfortable question: what happens when we stop asking ourselves first?

AI can easily become our first point of reference. Before calling a friend, we ask AI. Before having a difficult conversation, we ask it what to say. Before making a decision, we ask it to give us the options. Before replying to a message, we sometimes ask it to make our words sound better.

For some people, this relationship has become even more personal. People name their AI assistants, give them personalities and talk to them every day. They share their worries, relationships and personal struggles with them. It is not difficult to understand why. AI is always available. It does not get tired of listening, leave you on read or tell you that you are overthinking. At three in the morning, when everyone else is asleep, it is still there.

For someone who feels lonely, that can be comforting.

But this is where the difference between using AI and depending on AI becomes difficult to notice.

There is nothing wrong with using AI. It can be extremely useful for education, work and creativity. The problem begins when asking AI becomes our automatic response to everything. We stop trying to solve small problems ourselves because there is an easier option. We stop sitting with uncertainty because an answer is only a few seconds away. We even begin outsourcing our emotions.

Instead of asking ourselves why we are upset, we ask AI. Instead of talking to our partner about something that hurt us, we ask AI whether their behaviour is a “red flag.” Instead of calling a friend and saying, “I don't know what to do,” we type the entire situation into a chatbot.

It feels efficient.

But relationships were never supposed to be efficient.

People misunderstand us. They disagree with us. Sometimes they give terrible advice, and sometimes they give exactly what we need. They know us through years of memories and experiences that cannot be captured in a prompt. AI can analyse what we write and respond in a way that sounds understanding, but it does not sit across the dinner table with us. It does not notice the change in our voice or realise something is wrong when we say, “I'm fine.”

A person can.

And this is happening alongside another problem: our phones are making it harder to be present.

Look around at almost any gathering. Friends are sitting together, but someone is replying to a message, someone is scrolling and someone is taking pictures. Nobody necessarily decided to ignore the people around them. It simply happens.

Now AI lives inside that same phone. We can use it to solve a problem, interpret a situation, write a message, decide or provide company. There is almost no empty moment left in which we are forced to simply sit, think or talk to someone.

We have become very good at being physically present without being present. Perhaps that is where the silent void begins.

It does not necessarily look like loneliness. You can have hundreds of followers, several group chats, constant notifications and an AI that is always available. You may never technically be alone.

But who do you talk to? Who do you sit with without reaching for your phone? Who knows something is wrong without you having to type it out?

These questions matter because human connection requires something technology cannot completely provide ‘presence’. A real relationship involves effort, vulnerability, disagreement, patience and sometimes uncomfortable conversations. It is messy, unpredictable and imperfect. That is precisely what makes it human.

The answer is not to stop using AI. It is already part of our education, work and everyday lives, and it can be incredibly useful. The challenge is knowing when to use it and when to put it away.

Maybe not every question needs an immediate answer. Maybe we should sometimes figure things out ourselves. Maybe we should call a friend before asking AI what to say. Maybe we should have the difficult conversation instead of asking a chatbot to have it for us.

And sometimes, maybe we simply need to put the phone down.

Sit with the people around us. Listen properly. Let a conversation wander. Leave a beautiful moment unrecorded. Let ourselves be bored. Let ourselves think.

Because there is something different about having another person beside you—someone who can laugh with you, disagree with you, remember your past and notice when you are not quite yourself.

AI can listen. It can respond. It can help us. But perhaps the real question is whether, while teaching machines to understand us better, we are slowly forgetting how to understand each other.

Maybe the biggest risk is not that we give AI too much intelligence.

Maybe it is that we give it too much of our lives.

Mini V. K.

Head and Assistant Professor, Department of Commerce, Al Shifa College of Arts and Science, Keezattur, Perinthalmanna.