Love, Manipulation, and Narcissism: Exploring The Series Eyes
Love,
Manipulation, and Narcissism: Exploring The
Series Eyes
We often hear people say, “I cannot live
without that person.” Sometimes, we see this as a sign of deep love. But have
we ever thought about the difference between loving someone and becoming
obsessed with them? The Malayalam series Eyes made me think about this question
and the psychological factors behind abusive relationships.
One of the disturbing moments in the series
is the cafe scene, where a man asks his former girlfriend to give their
relationship another chance. When she refuses, the situation takes a
frightening turn. This scene raises an important question about how people
respond to rejection. For some individuals, rejection is not simply the end of
a relationship. They may experience it as an insult, a loss of control, or a
threat to their self-worth.People who are highly sensitive to rejection may
interpret another person's refusal as a personal attack. Instead of accepting
the decision, they may respond with anger, repeated attempts to contact the
person, or a desire to regain control.
Another interesting aspect of the series is
Milan's obsession with actress Rithika. He becomes convinced that she has
feelings for him. This reminds us of the role of cognitive distortions, which
are ways of thinking that lead us to interpret situations inaccurately. A
person may assume that someone is interested in them simply because that is
what they want to believe. They may ignore evidence that contradicts their
expectations and interpret ordinary behaviour as a sign of love.
This is where we need to understand the
difference between love and obsession. Love involves recognising another
person's feelings and individuality. Obsession, on the other hand, may involve
excessive thoughts about someone, difficulty accepting their decisions, and a
strong desire to possess their attention. When a person's own wishes become
more important than the other person's freedom, the relationship can become
harmful.
The series also brings attention to
psychological abuse through the relationship between Sajin and Shobitha. Many
people associate abuse only with physical violence, but emotional abuse can be
equally damaging to a person's well-being. Repeated humiliation, manipulation,
threats, and controlling behaviour may gradually affect a person's self-esteem
and confidence. In some relationships, the person experiencing abuse may begin
to question their own judgement or feel responsible for the other person's behaviour.
Attachment theory also offers a useful way
to understand relationships. Our early experiences and later relationships can
influence how we respond to closeness, separation, and insecurity. Some people
may become extremely fearful of abandonment, while others may struggle with
emotional closeness. However, attachment styles do not determine whether
someone will become abusive. Regardless of their attachment patterns,
individuals are responsible for how they treat others.
Narcissistic personality disorder is also portrayed
here . Entitlement, a strong need for admiration, and difficulty considering
other people's feelings may be associated with narcissistic traits. However,
not every person who behaves selfishly, possessively, or abusively has
narcissistic personality disorder. A proper diagnosis requires a professional
assessment. Understanding a person's behaviour is important, but it should
never become an excuse for abuse.
Another question worth asking is why some
women find it difficult to leave abusive relationships. Emotional attachment,
fear, financial dependence, family pressure, and the hope that the person will
change can make leaving complicated. Sometimes, periods of affection after
harmful behaviour may create confusion and strengthen the emotional bond.
Instead of asking, “Why doesn't she leave?”, we should ask what difficulties
she faces and what support she needs.
As a society, we need to rethink the way we
understand romantic relationships. Jealousy is not always a sign of love,
possessiveness is not proof of care, and rejection is not an invitation to
continue pursuing someone. Healthy relationships require trust, emotional
maturity, mutual respect, and the ability to accept another person's decisions.
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